The Definition of Passion

Maybe I talk (or write too much) or maybe the lines on my face are beginning to show (wisdom comes with age apparently), but over the recent years, more people are asking me about how they can find passion for life. How do we know this intense enthusiasm I’m feeling right now is not a flash in the pan, they ask.

I used to wonder about that too. How exactly can passion be defined? I’ve heard of people who tell me they are passionate about their job, certain causes, a particular hobby or life pursuit. But how exactly do we pin it down?

Someone I interviewed recently said that you’ll know it’s passion when you think about doing it (your passion) for the next 5,10, 15, 20 years and you still feel OK about it, maybe even look forward to it.

Someone else said it’s passion when you’re willing to do it even if you don’t get paid. I find this disconcerting - because money always complicates matters. Can you pay someone to stay passionate about something for a long time? It’s a grey line, because it depends on how much you’re willing to fork out. My guess is some people may even sell their souls if the price was right.

In my exclusive interview with squash queen Nicol David recently, we talked about squash, on the courts and off. Although I’m no squash fan, I was totally overwhelmed by how passionate Nicol is about her game, to the extent of giving up university to pursue a life perfecting her passion.  

I was specifically told by my editor to ‘find out what the real Nicol is like’. Keep squash minimal. Ask what she likes apart from squash.

I tried. We talked about all kinds of things, but somehow everything always came back to squash. Her life choice: squash. Her principles: squash. Her destiny: squash. Her friends: squash. Her family: squash. The only thing that kept them all intertwined is the hard work she put into it- the many hours, the dedication, the absolute commitment.

A few days after the interview, reports of her winning the KL Open for the umphteen time appeared in the papers. She’d suffered a small injury, but she brushed it off as ‘no biggie’. How many injuries had she suffered and how many times had she brushed them off and sloughed on over her entire career?

That was when I realized the true definition of passion. Sacrifice. Dedication. Pain.

How many times had I scratched my arms, face and legs while gardening? How about the times when my body is aching after an entire day of shoveling and digging, yet I still whisper to myself ‘just one last one’ as I tackled another patch?

How about the many bricks that fell on my toes, causing internal bleeding that takes a year to heal and the almost endless ant bites? Not to mention the sunburn, perpetual tan and premature skin ageing.

When a certain pleasure is so immense it causes pain, it would have crossed into the definition of passion.

Carrying hundreds of tonnes of bricks, rocks, sand and soil is no less painful than mountain-climbing, diving, marathon-running or even creating graphic design or chocolate cakes to die for. Somehow somewhere physical pain is always involved, otherwise you won’t see the same person doing it for one decade, two and for a lifetime.

It makes you think twice the next time someone tells you they’re ‘really passionate’ about something, doesn’t it?

To know whether they really mean it, why not ask them to prove it? Like proud warriors in a battle, people who are really passionate about something will have scars to show for it. These scars may be physical, emotional, even mental- but they’re still at it (their passion), day after day, year after year.

So how do you find your passion in life then? Ask yourself : Am I willing to endure pain and suffering to do this? If you had answered yes, then congratulations.

If not, continue searching and you will find it. Passion is what you're willing to (metaphorically) die for. Once you find it, your life will be so rich there will be no turning back, scars and all.